I want to take care of your precious heart and let you know that in today’s blog article I talk about the passing of our dear friend, I’ll let you decide if it is something you are up to reading today.

I know you visit my little corner of social media because it is a safe place, and I want you to always leave feeling a sense of peace and calm. I’ll wish you well, send you love and continue on with sharing my story. One of wanting to counteract my grief, I want to create things, bring beauty, light and love from it all. It’s helping me restore some sense of balance to what feels like a huge void has been left.

It’s been a time of adjusting to a new normal after saying goodbye to our dearly loved family friend, someone who I have known since I was a little girl, someone Lil has always known and someone I took Michael “home” to meet, to get her tick of approval so to speak, that was twenty-two years ago. I’m trying to move through the grief and just let myself be. If I burst into tears, that’s ok. If it feels like I am walking through treacle and everything seems too hard, that’s ok. The loss of loved ones has taught me to go easy, there is no one size fits all for how we move through these times. In Lil’s words, Give Yourself The Grace That You Deserve.  I catch myself counting the days since I last called then realising this isn’t part of my normal day to day, week to week routine anymore. Someone who’s kindness made such an impact from when I was a little girl to now, has been like a mother to me, a grandmother to Lil and good friend to Michael is gone. The loving face that stood out in a crowded room.

To counteract the grief I want to create things, bring beauty and light and love from it all.  Restore some kind of balance in my heart since Gwen is gone. Take photos of Springtime, it feels all so fleeting, marvel at its beauty. Gwen loved her garden and I’m grateful that we got to spend time together in her garden and in our garden. Those simple moments make life richer. This shared passion is where I am finding solace. I’m grateful for these memories, I am grateful that they are a part of our family’s history.

With Lil’s scheduled surgery being moved forward we are going gently. This is a season of tending our family closely, taking extra precious care of each other, staying close to home, doing paid work, working on  our own projects and holding space to rest and be. Spending time in the garden, planting, watering, looking after the animals in our care and providing a safe place for wildlife that chooses to come to Fairy Wren Cottage.

One step in front of the other, making sure we eat healthy meals, take time to meditate (especially on the garden bench), try and have enough sleep, get enough fresh air and plenty of outside time during the day. These are the things that are non negotiable, anchoring us.

I want to honour Gwen’s memory, think of her fondly as I potter about, of course I will always miss her but I also want to hold  dear the love and joy and friendship.

Take precious care.

Sending Light and Love,

Jude x